Tuesday, May 29, 2012

The Downside of Trying to Concieve: A Top Ten List

Infertility is defined as the inability to conceive or maintain a pregnancy within a certain period of time. For couples under the age of 35, infertility is diagnosed when they fail to conceive after 1 year of regular, unprotected sexual intercourse. In addition, couples who are able to conceive but experience repeat miscarriages may also be considered having infertility. If she is over 35 years old, it is diagnosed after 6 months of unprotected, well-timed intercourse.*

According to this definition, I've now been faced with infertility issues twice in my life. It took me and my husband a little over a year to conceive Abbey. Now we find ourselves trying for number 2, and facing similar circumstances.

I'm usually very private about this issue; I don't like to put our "private" matters out there, ya know. (I could make a joke about being a good Catholic girl, but I won't.) However, over the past few years I've been quite blessed with a very unique support group, and they've given me the voice to talk about it, and the courage to find the humor in my situation. In my humblest of opinions, humor is the best ally a girl can having when facing issues trying to conceive. I just wish I had realized that sooner! And so with that, I present to you The Downside of Trying to Conceive: A Top Ten List.

10. Listening to helpful advice about "not trying" or "just relaxing".  (As if I could ever really relax.)

9. Practically speaking in code. AF, BBT, 2WW, EWCM... you know what all of these things mean. And honestly, you wish you didn't.

8. Pregnancy symptoms mirror PMS symptoms, and your brain has the power to create symptoms all on it's own. This is truly an evil side-effect of ttc.

7. Peeing on sticks. And peeing on sticks. And peeing on sticks.

6. Charting. And Temping. And that damn thermometer beeping at you every morning.

5. Stalking the calendar. (Is it time to pee on a stick yet!?)

4. Hearing, and politely digesting with a smile on your face, such wisdom as "god's timing is perfect!" or "everything happens for a  reason!"

3. EVERYONE around you is suddenly pregnant. Even the neighbor's daughter's friend who swore she was done after number 5.

2. Sex suddenly becomes more regimented than your job.

1. Realizing you just peed on your last stick. At Midnight. And it's negative, again.

And as a bonus:

A chicken and the egg scenario... Sore boobs. If they're sore, I must be pregnant! Right? Or are they  sore because I keep pushing on them to see if they're sore? Discuss. Or, rather, let's not.

*From the Center for Human Reproduction; New York.


  1. I love this all!

    Can I elaborate?

    7. And/or peeing in a cup and trying to keep it out of your toddler/husband's hands. I'm super close to writing "MY PEE CUP" on the side of it. Too bad my toddler can't read...and my H prefers not to.

    6. And falling asleep with the damn thing in your mouth! It's great waking up a half hour later wondering what is going on. Thank God for the temp recall!

    I really hope you get a bfp soon! Yup, you know what I said, haha.

    1. Very insightful add-ons, Dani! Thank you for sharing, and I hope you get your BFP soon too!